


Mmmmm, dinner sounds tasty

by Nicecuppatea



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Drabble, Multi, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-10
Updated: 2016-03-10
Packaged: 2018-05-25 23:07:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6213799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nicecuppatea/pseuds/Nicecuppatea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Momomomma posted some wonderful Kingsman prompts which made me smile so I had fun writing a quick drabble to make other people smile. And here it is - tidied up from the Tumblr. </p>
<p>Here's the prompt:</p>
<p>Eggsy likes to nick things from Harry, things that are little clues. He’ll take his coffee cup, steal a fork, and lift his favorite tie and Harry will know that he wants them to go out for dinner soon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mmmmm, dinner sounds tasty

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MoMoMomma](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoMoMomma/gifts).



The door slammed shut and an irate Merlin stormed into the kitchen where Harry was snipping the rosemary hanging upside over the oak butcher’s block and sprinkling it on the lamb steaks. 

Merlin had always excelled at deliberately scaring the pants off new recruits with little effort but Harry was rather surprised to hear the genuine anger in his voice. “This was left sitting on top of my tablet where everyone could see it. What the fuck is it and who will I murder tonight?” 

He held up a beautifully decorated Spode dinner plate with a toy lamb and two condoms stuck to it; the pink condom had something white protruding from it - cotton wool? - whilst the brown condom - chocolate flavour? - had a large lipstick mark at the closed end and a few strands of brown hair glued to it. It was a most gruesome sight. 

Oh dear, thought Harry, the boy really has gone too far this time. 

Harry turned back to his frying pan trying to hide his broad smile. “Eggsy wants lamb for dinner followed by a fuck from you whilst I suck. I assume the hair is indicating that way round but I'm sure he'd be as happy if we swapped. He'll be home in a minute so you can ask him, old boy." He nonchalantly poured the wine into three glasses. "One cannot be sure but, knowing his predilections, I rather think that the plate indicates he would like to be spread out on the kitchen table.” 

He turned to see Merlin's anger melting and a gruff chuckle preceded a wry grin. "Well, if that's what he wants then hurry up and serve dinner, old man."

**Author's Note:**

> Do subliminal messages work? I just went and bought lamb steak for dinner. I'd be fascinated if anyone else does.
> 
> I will get back to writing Spunk! now.


End file.
